3 thoughts on “Bill O'Reilly versus Michael Moore”

  1. MM chew him up and spat him out.

    When Bill can’t say “shut up” and switch off his interviewee’s mic, he’s pretty hopeless. Same for all bullies.

  2. Didn’t think he did particularly well, to be honest. Moore often suffers when it comes to dealing with the minutae of an argument, and I felt he really needed to engage O’Reilly and score a few points.

    Instead we get the same old Moore-o, swaggering his way through jingoistic cliche and facile emotive analogies. Why not challenge him more closely over the conduct of the Afghanistan war? Why not point to the fact that 40% of Americans now think foreign policy is a key issue at the Presidential elections (it was around 5% last time)? And, for christ’s sake, when O’Reilly kept asking Moore to concede that Bush had simply made a “mistake” over the WMD issue, point out that it’s a pretty bloody big mistake for a President to make, and shouldn’t he be thinking about heading back to the ranch ’bout now?

    Recently saw 9/11 and wasn’t as upset with it as I thought I was going to be – usual complaints still there, but on the whole he made a good point well. But put him in front of a live camera with someone bit quicker than O’Reilly, and I think (like he came close to a couple of times in this interview) he might fold.

  3. Dear Mr. Oreilly:

    You swine. You vulgar little maggot. You worthless bag of filth. As they say
    in Texas, you couldn’t pour water out of a boot with instructions printed
    on the heel. You are a canker, an open wound. I would rather kiss a lawyer
    than be seen with you. You took your last vacation in the Islets of
    Langerhans.

    You’re a putrescent mass, a walking vomit. You are a spineless little worm
    deserving nothing but the profoundest contempt. You are a jerk, a cad, a
    weasel. Your life is a monument to stupidity. You are a stench, a
    revulsion, a big suck on a sour lemon.

    You are a bleating foal, a curdled staggering mutant dwarf smeared richly
    with the effluvia and offal accompanying your alleged birth into a hostile
    world. You are an insensate, blinking calf, meaningful to nobody,
    abandoned by the puke-drooling, giggling beasts who sired you and then
    died of shame in recognition of what they had done. They were a bit late.

    I will never get over the embarrassment of belonging to the same species
    as you. You are a monster, an ogre, a malformity. I barf at the very
    thought of you. You have all the appeal of a paper cut. Lepers avoid you.
    You are vile, worthless, less than nothing. You are a weed, a fungus, the
    dregs of this earth. And did I mention that you smell?

    Try to edit your responses of unnecessary material before attempting to
    impress us with your insight. The evidence that you are a nincompoop will
    still be available to readers, but they will be able to access it ever so
    much more rapidly.

    You snail-skulled little rabbit. Would that a hawk pick you up, drive its
    beak into your brain, and upon finding it rancid set you loose to fly
    briefly before spattering the ocean rocks with the frothy pink shame of
    your ignoble blood. May you choke on the queasy, convulsing nausea of your
    own trite, foolish beliefs.

    You are weary, stale, flat and unprofitable. You are grimy, squalid, nasty
    and profane. You are foul and disgusting. You’re a fool, an ignoramus.
    Monkeys look down on you. Even sheep won’t have sex with you. You are
    unreservedly pathetic, starved for attention, and lost in a land that
    reality forgot. You are not ANSI compliant. You have a couple of address
    lines shorted together. You should be promoted to Engineering Manager.

    And what meaning do you expect your delusionally self-important statements
    of unknowing, inexperienced opinion to have with us? What fantasy do you
    hold that you would believe that your tiny-fisted tantrums would have more
    weight than that of a leprous desert rat, spinning rabidly in a circle,
    waiting for the bite of the snake?

    You are a waste of flesh. You have no rhythm. You are ridiculous and
    obnoxious. You are the moral equivalent of a leech. You are a living
    emptiness, a meaningless void. You are sour and senile. You are a
    loathsome disease, a puerile slack-jawed drooling meatslapper. You make
    Quakers shout and strike Pentecostals silent. You are the kind of person
    who would remove this reference to Version 5.40 and to
    http://www.guymacon.com/insult.txt so people will think that you wrote
    this. Your mother had to tie a pork chop around your neck just to get
    your dog to play with you. You think P.D.Q. Bach is the greatest
    composer who ever lived. You prefer L. Ron Hubbard to Larry Niven and
    Jerry Pournelle. Hee-Haw is too deep for you. You would watch test
    patterns all day if the other inmates would let you.

    On a good day you’re a half-wit. You remind me of drool. You are deficient
    in all that lends character. You have the personality of wallpaper. You
    are dank and filthy. You are asinine and benighted. You are the source of
    all unpleasantness. You spread misery and sorrow wherever you go.

    You smarmy lagerlout git. You bloody woofter sod. Bugger off, pillock. You
    grotty wanking oik artless base-court apple-john. You clouted boggish
    foot-licking half-twit. You dankish clack-dish plonker. You gormless
    crook-pated tosser. You bloody churlish boil-brained clotpole ponce. You
    craven dewberry pisshead cockup pratting naff. You cockered bum-bailey
    poofter. You gob-kissing gleeking flap-mouthed coxcomb. You dread-bolted
    fobbing beef-witted clapper-clawed flirt-gill.

    You are so clueless that if we stripped you naked, soaked you in clue
    musk, and dropped you into a field full of horny clues, You still would
    not have a clue. You couldn’t pour water out of a boot with instructions
    printed on the heel.

    You are a fiend and a coward, and you have bad breath. You are degenerate,
    noxious and depraved. I feel debased just for knowing you exist. I despise
    everything about you, and I wish you would go away.

    I cannot believe how incredibly stupid you are. I mean rock-hard stupid.
    Dehydrated-rock-hard stupid. Stupid so stupid that it goes way beyond the
    stupid we know into a whole different dimension of stupid. You are
    trans-stupid stupid. Meta-stupid. Stupid collapsed on itself so far that
    even the neutrons have collapsed. Stupid so dense that no intellect
    can escape. Singularity stupid. Blazing hot mid-day sun on Mercury stupid.
    You emit more stupid in one second than our entire galaxy emits in a year.
    Quasar stupid. Your writing has to be a troll. Nothing in our universe can
    really be this stupid. Perhaps this is some primordial fragment from the
    original big bang of stupid. Some pure essence of a stupid so
    uncontaminated by anything else as to be beyond the laws of physics that
    we know. I’m sorry. I can’t go on. This is an epiphany of stupid for me.
    After this, you may not hear from me again for a while. I don’t have
    enough strength left to deride your ignorant questions and half baked
    comments about unimportant trivia, or any of the rest of this drivel. Duh.

    The only thing worse than your logic is your manners. I have snipped away
    most of what you wrote, because, well… it didn’t really say
    anything. Your attempt at constructing a creative flame was pitiful. I
    mean, really, stringing together a bunch of insults among a load of
    babbling was hardly effective… Maybe later in life, after you have
    learned to read, write, spell, and count, you will have more success.
    True, these are rudimentary skills that many of us “normal” people take
    for granted that everyone has an easy time of mastering. But we sometimes
    forget that there are “challenged” persons in this world who find these
    things more difficult. If I had known, that this was your case then I
    would have never read your post. It just wouldn’t have been “right”. Sort
    of like parking in a handicap space. I wish you the best of luck in the
    emotional, and social struggles that seem to be placing such a demand on
    you.

    P.S.:
    You are hypocritical, greedy, violent, malevolent, vengeful, cowardly,
    deadly, mendacious, meretricious, loathsome, despicable, belligerent,
    opportunistic, barratrous, contemptible, criminal, fascistic, bigoted,
    racist, sexist, avaricious, tasteless, idiotic, brain-damaged, imbecilic,
    insane, arrogant, deceitful, demented, lame, self-righteous, byzantine,
    conspiratorial, satanic, fraudulent, libelous, bilious, splenetic,
    spastic, ignorant, clueless, illegitimate, harmful, destructive, dumb
    evasive, double-talking, devious, revisionist, narrow, manipulative,
    paternalistic, fundamentalist, dogmatic, idolatrous, unethical, cultic,
    diseased, suppressive, controlling, restrictive, malignant, deceptive,
    dim, crazy, weird, dystopic, stifling, uncaring, plantigrade, grim,
    unsympathetic, jargon-spouting, censorious, secretive, aggressive,
    mind-numbing, arassive, poisonous, flagrant, self-destructive, abusive,
    socially-retarded, puerile, and Generally Not Good.

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